JACKSONVILLE, FLORIDA -- The name of the current Hair Consultant, Ben "One With The Tao" Paulson was never specifically mentioned, but candidate "Florida Pete" Harrison (adjacent photo) made obvious comparisons that he would be a "do somet hing" Hair Consultant.

Pete wrote: "These are troubled times indeed my fellow ColoradoGuy.com friends. After one full year of 'do-nothing-ness' our web host's follicles have sustained damage of untold proportion. We must consider the mid-life crisis Steve is currently faced with and the implications that it presents to his hairline." wrote Pete.

Outgoing Hair Consultant Ben, who opted not to run for a second term, has done absolutely nothing for Steve and was blasted for not attending the 2005 ColoradoGuy Festival. Steve has greatly frowned upon Ben's use of his public position to push his liberal political views on the Politics Forum. At one awful point, 53% of the visitors of his web site wanted Ben to be fired according to a front page poll, but Ben survived because he met the minimum requirements of keeping in touch with Steve, not being a drama queen and not advising Steve to cut his hair.

Hair Consultant Ben's Apathy And How Pete Will Be a Different Kind Of Leader

"Because of our previous Hair Consultant's apathy, Steve's hairline is now facing a recession of untold magnitude. The previous administration drove Steve's robust economy of healthy hair straight into the gutters of a hairline recession that will be difficult and trying for all of us. Yet, we must face it together, as a community. We will pull up our bootstraps and tighten our belts and with my leadership we will put Steve back into the annals of hair-greatness. Hair heros like Fabio, Michael Landon, Fonzi, & Coach Jimmy Johnson have already secured coveted spots in follicle history .... and so too will Steve Garufi after I have implemented my full one year hair regimen to halt this hairline recession." wrote Pete.

"There will be less poor nutritional taxation on Steve's challenged follicle growth and a trickle-down of herbal shampoos & vitamin enriched conditioners to maximize hair volume and health. I will work dilligently with each hair's end to reduce the partisan splits that have been occurring there as 'Do Nothing' has done nothing to mend the splitting ends of unity. We must come together as a community to overcome and revitalize what remains of Steve's locks and I am here to be your "Doing Something" candidate and with your vote I intended to do just that." concluded Pete.

This year's Hair Consultant election will be held on April 13-16, 2006, and all are encouraged to vote. Visit the 2006 Hair Consultant election page to learn more about all of the candidates.