BUENA VISTA, COLO. -
Steve "ColoradoGuy" Garufi achieved the unthinkable when
he shut out all three of his opponents in Microsoft
Hearts this morning as part of his early day routine. (Click on the adjacent photo for proof!)
Having played thousands of games since owning his first computer six years ago, his crushing victory
against his three computer opponents named "Pauline", "Michele" and "Ben" was the first
time ever in his life.
"This was such an accomplishment and I always dreamed
of a total shut out." declared Steve in his living room,
"I've been playing Microsoft Hearts for years and years, and I've always
worked towards this. So yeah, this is a big deal."
To celebrate the occasion, Steve ate a
special macaroni lunch and
insisted on Ragu meat sauce (as opposed to the plain variety) to compliment the meal.
Steve, a so-called "Internet personality", has been enjoying a
period of his self-esteem being enhanced recently. First,
he completed a 1,000 piece jigsaw puzzle in
impressive fashion, then he made news by achieving a
33-day Super Big Gulp drinking streak, and now this.
"I don't know anybody who has gotten a total shut out in Microsoft Hearts,
so that'll tell you how great this experience is." added Steve.
"I'm flying high today. Now I know how people feel when they get hole-in-one in golf."